Can i get deleted messages back on instagram?

Only if it was unsent recently, and only for you to hide it — a deleted Instagram DM is gone from Meta's side. Instagram gives you a short window after sending in which you can long-press a message and choose Unsend; once that window closes, the option disappears and neither you nor any app can bring the message back. "Delete for you" only hides your copy.

We build Ultimate Phone Spy, a parental-control dashboard for Android, Windows and Mac — not an Instagram recovery tool. What it does is capture Instagram activity on a supervised device as it happens: message previews, app usage and screenshots, so a conversation is recorded while it exists rather than recovered later. That is the only mechanism that works, and it needs the device in hand with the user's knowledge. We do not support iPhone, so no iCloud-based Instagram recovery claim from us or anyone else holds up. Details are on parental control features.

Practical routes, shortest first:

1. Download Your Information at accountscenter.instagram.com → Your information and permissions → Download your information → select Messages. It can include chats as of the export; anything already unsent is usually missing.
2. Notification centre. An unread preview may still be sitting in the shade or on the lock screen.
3. The other person's copy. Deletion on your side does not touch theirs.

Ignore "Instagram message recovery" sites that want your password — they take the account, not restore the chat.

If what you actually need is oversight of a teenager's Instagram use, the first-party option is Instagram's own Family Centre (parental supervision with the teen's consent) plus Screen Time on iPhone or Family Link on Android for time limits. A monitoring app belongs in that same disclosed, in-household frame — not on a partner's or an adult's phone, where it is unlawful in most jurisdictions.

We covered the longer version in this thread.